do we realize?

this one is for the ladies.

Ive been reading this book called Sex God, by Rob Bell, and instead of me telling you what to think, just read below. Be encouraged and think about some of this stuff.



heres a bit from the book.



"You don't need a man by your side to validate you as a woman. You already are loved and valued. You're god enough exactly as you are. Do you believe this? Becuase it's true. You have limitless worth and value. If you embrace this truth, it will affect every area of life, especially your relationship with men.

You are worth dying for.

You worth does not come from your body, your mind, your work, what you produce, what you put out, how much money you make. You worth does not come from whether or not you have a man. Your worth does not come from whether or not men notice you. YOu have inestimable worth that comes from your creator.

You dont have to give yourself away to earn a man's love. You're better than that. You're already loved.

Your strength is a beautiful thing. And when you live in it, when you carry yourself with hono and dignity that are yours, it forces men around you to relate to you on more then just a flesh level.

You are worth dying for."

what the sunshine brings

So, I’ve been looking at a lot of my old pictures lately, of my close friends.
And... I’ve realized this summer is pretty important. It marks change.

I am going to miss all.
You that I’ve been at my worst with, that I’ve made a school with, that I’ve hung out with, cried with, and that I’ve laughed with.

You guys have pushed me, taught me, encouraged me, and loved who I am.


I love you guys. That won't change.
Colleen

this to shall pass.

hard weeks happen. we are warn and tired. but we move and we pass.
ive found alot of strength in "When i am Weak, then i am Strong"
i am weak. but God makes me strong.

this week we are doing 30 hour famine.
and i think the whole time i was lacking some seriously perspective.
i am raising money, and not feeding myself to feed children. to feed their families.
not to have cliques with my friends. or a bunch of confussion and drama.
for the children. to further gods kingdom.
and i am encougaed.

everyone also, check out sufjan stevens!
random throught for the day, but he is an incrediable artist.
really honest. throught out lyrics. i love it.

more posts soon. more happiness.

tower over me

Keep me safe inside.
Your arms like towers, Tower over me.
'Cause we are broken.What must we do to restore,
Our innocence, And all the promise we adored?
Give us life again,'Cause we just wanna be whole

these words have been powerful to me.
they make me want to just fall to my knees.
Its from a song "We are Broken" by Paramore.

i found out stuff today.
and i guess it broke me. feeling really helpless.
i have so much to say to you. and im silent.
i just need to be there. i know my place.
and live for hope. that you will supply.

"your arms like towers, tower over me"
there is great comfort in great brokeness.
there is great power, in the most tired weakness.

"But nothing can heal like the touch of Jesus in someone's life."
Kyle Zavitz.

i love the sun

my room has this huge window in it.
and the sun goes down on my window's side of the house.
and i get to enjoy the last bit of sun as it brings the day to a close.
right now. snow is being thrown around by the wind, but the sun, it just creates beauty.
and the sun never really changes.
it is always there. it may come and leave at different times.
but it symbolizes time.
the same sun that warms our faces in the winter, will be tucked away behind the clouds during the fresh rain in spring.
that same sun will highlight the beauty of nature in the summer and will escape to allow the tress to embrace their fall colours.

i love the sun for that reason.
it is there. highlighting the best and worst in our lives.

and the creator of the universe gave us the sun.
to keep us moving, encouraged about the future and warm.

i love the sun.

in light of everything

these past few days have been hard.
i have been upset. i have been lonely. basically all over the place.
i cant focus. i dont know what i need to go.
i just felt like i was standing still, while everyone and everything moved past me and around me.
and its an overwhelming feeling. the feeling of being stuck.
unsure what my next should should be.
and its been hard.

alot of stuff has hit me hard.. all at once.
and i wasnt ready for it. and i wasnt expecting it.
i have been really happy. ive been feeling really blessed and at peace... so all of the stress and emotional strain hit pretty hard.

i came to God with it. i gave it to him.
i could talk to as many people as i want to about it.
i could ask for support. but nothing is like the grace and deliverance of god.
he supplied alot of peace. and im so thankful for that.
in light of all of the pain that i was feeling.. he was there.
and he took away what i could not take away myself.

Today i went for a walk. just to clear my head and fill my lungs with some winter air.
i was so taken aback by my walk.
as i walked through the nature area i was really taken given time to think.
all of the leaves where gone. the pond was frozen, just on top.
everything was just in the very fragile and raw state.
i could see through all of the tress. everything was very exposed.

and... isnt it like that with our relationship with God.
like trees, we have stuff that cover us from god; our pride, our pain, our addiction, whatever it is... just like leaves on a tree.
but in these moments.. where we experiance brokeness, where we are unable to support ourselves.. we are become completely bare and god see's all of us.
and thats when he can heal us. we cant hide ourselves.. and thats when god touches our hearts.
i am just feeling so filled, despite times of stress.

i am incapable, but the lover of my soul is capable. and i can rest.

life.

im listening to Hungry by Joy Williams.
and i just read a blog by a close friend of mine.
and it just... pulled something in my heart. this real truth. something that was very real in my own life, but i just hadn't realized.

this past weekend i was at my camp.
and i was home. not home in brooklin.
i was just home. i was at peace.

that place is such an escape.
a place that lets you just become the raw person that god created you to be.
and i feel so myself there.

these people just surround you. and love you.
not the cheap kind of love. the heart on msn love.
this love, where they will sit with you and listen to every word you say.
that they will tease you, and make you feel cared for.
the love that is so evident when they smile at you. and so genuine.

they bring out the best in me. and thats so cliche.
but its true.
i can say the dumbest things. and its okay.
they laugh. and take me for this thing that i am.

i dont have to create myself. i have no image to unhold. no expectations to meet.
they see me in the eyes that christ sees me. and its just...
its incrediable. and im so thankful for that.
i have learned how to love. and how to be patient. and how to be weak. and how you be strengthed.


its a glimpse of heaven.
a place after life, that i, who am completely undeserving, will experiance.
and that gives me hope.